An Umbrella Story

Jill and I went to the Mitendi Center recently so she could check on some repair work that had been done, check on the programs, and so we could work on a new project. Jill needed photos of the students, so we spent the better part of a day taking photos of several grade levels. 

It was cosmetology day at the center and the girls were practicing with one another's hair.

I love going out there and this was no exception, even though it was a HOT, sunny day. After a while, Benedite was sent to hold this umbrella over me. I felt pretty silly, but it seemed important to everyone so I allowed it. Good thing I did, because I was already sunburned and it probably prevented painful blisters for me.

In church yesterday, our pastor was explaining the word "submission" as the act of placing yourself under something or someone else, so in a literal sense I was submitting myself to the umbrella. Once I did that, I was under the umbrella's protection and it was my shield from the harsh rays of the sun and from the heat. Since Benedite was also submitted to the umbrella, we got to enjoy each other's company and have the pleasure of working together. It isn't so difficult to place yourself under something (authority) or someone (God, our spouse) when you know it is for your own good, which is how Biblical submission in Ephesians 5 is supposed to work.

The women and children at Mitendi are under the authority, protection and guidance of many committed Christians who love God. They have a HARD job and face many challenges both personal and ministry-related. Over the years I have prayed this verse many times for my own children because I knew the importance of Godly teachers, leaders and examples in their lives. Please pray this for the students at Mitendi and for all of the people who are involved in any capacity of the ministry. Pray that these children and young girls will have the courage and trust to submit themselves to those God has sent to guide them. Pray that their shepherds will all be/remain fully submitted to God and have hearts for Him.

"Then I will give you shepherds after my own heart, who

will lead you with knowledge and understanding." Jer. 3:15

Parents' Day

In the Democratic Republic of Congo, instead of having a Mothers' Day and a Fathers' Day, there is one public holiday for both called Parents' Day, which is today. There are many similarities between DRC and the U.S. regarding its intent to honor parents and how it is celebrated.

During the week, David had an opportunity to talk about Parents' Day with a Congolese friend and learn more about local observances. There is a strong church presence in Kinshasa, but there is still also a stronghold of animism and belief in witchcraft/magic even among some who believe in Christ. This friend thankfully doesn't struggle with that but he told David of many in his community who do. 

There are some who, if they are unhappy or suffering and their parents are deceased, will blame the parents. They go to the cemetery and visit their parents' graves and yell at them, asking them why they let all the bad in their lives happen and accusing them of not caring or taking action. They believe the parents have the power from beyond the grave to intervene in their lives, so when that doesn't happen, they feel betrayed.

Please pray for the people of Congo, those who know Christ and those who do not, that they will be able to discern what is true, that their trust in God will be stronger than their fears and superstitions, and that they will experience true freedom in Christ. 

Precious

We all occasionally have a day that causes us before it is finished to think perhaps we should have stayed in bed so as to avoid all the day’s mishaps. Yesterday was my turn. 

I didn’t expect everything to take longer than usual and to feel rushed. I didn’t expect to have a headache all day, or to have an invasion of ants akin to an Alfred Hitchcok movie. Less than an hour after my floors were swept and mopped, ants were all over the floors AND walls of one end of the house. I did not expect that as I was spraying insecticide and sweeping ants off the walls and floors, my son would accidentally spill an entire box of Hershey’s Special Dark Cocoa Powder on yet another portion of the freshly mopped floor. It was the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back. 

Cocoa can be hard to find here and very expensive when it is available. Good cocoa is even more rare and Hershey’s Special Dark cocoa does not exist here at all, ever.  I had brought back a couple of boxes from furlough and they were going to have to last until the next furlough two years later.  It was an accident, and I knew it, but for just a second I wanted to turn into something like Gollum yelling about his Precious. I thank God that as I knelt there sweeping up the mess I looked up and saw my son’s face just before I was about to let my frustration fly out of my mouth like an arrow and hit him right in the heart. It gave me enough pause to be able to stop myself.  I still had to explain that my frustration was with the way our day was going and not with him, but at least I did not have to apologize for hurtful words. 

It is in those "unexpecteds" that our true character shows, and I saw that I had plenty of room for improvement. I also saw that God is even now still working on me. I saw Him give grace in a moment when I needed it. He gently reminded me that cocoa and clean floors are very nice things to have, but they are not precious. We are here in Congo because people are what is precious - so precious that Christ gave his life for them. 



Please be in prayer for us, that we might always be mindful of what is truly precious and that our words and deeds will reflect that. Pray for the precious people of Congo, that they will place their faith in Christ and find their strength in Him.

Two Transformers

Three phase pole mounted transformer in Syria. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Our week went something like this:

- Our daughter needed oral surgery. We carry very high deductibles, and this year she actually met hers. That's not a good thing but it meant if we could get her surgery done this year, it would save a ton of money. The problem was that she is going back to school in a week and has no transportation once she gets there.

- Honey, the toilet is leaking again."

- Honey, the bedroom air-conditioner is not working."

- Honey, the a/c in the car (that just got repaired) is not working."

Everyday it was a new problem and no time to deal with figuring out what is wrong, shopping for tools and parts, and repairing it all. The really fun news came yesterday, when we called the electric company after our power was off for 24 hours:

- The transformer is burnt up. It will be a long time before you have electricity again.

Without a transformer, there is no power. Period.

The very word transformer brings up some unpleasant memories of our first year here. The transformer burned and it was over five weeks before we had electricity. Then just weeks after we finally got one, election season began and a candidate commandeered our transformer and hauled it away to use for a neighborhood that housed some of his constituents. 

I won't lie. That was hard. It would be challenging enough for anyone raised with the convenience of 24/7 electricity. It was our first year, so we were still not accustomed to the different life and the climate. It was hard to sleep at night in the heat, and being exhausted just made things harder to deal with. At the time I was dealing with painful bone spurs in both feet that eventually required surgery. AND, we were all dealing with the emotions that go along with the first child graduating and getting ready to go to live across the ocean. 

But one thing we learned through all of that is that we were not all alone. God never left us, and He showed his love and presence in very tangible ways. We had friends and team members who let us use their washing machines and take showers at their houses. He provided extra funds so we could buy fuel to run the generator to charge batteries and cool down the fridge. He used others to counsel me to make plans to get my feet taken care of instead of trying to stick it out until furlough (another two years away). He gave us people who prayed for us and encouraged us. The fact that without a transformer we had no power source for our home reminded us that God is the source of our strength.

God is no less present or loving this time around either. As challenging as it can be to schedule a medical procedure on short notice, He provided someone with a great reputation who not only fit Emily in right away but also worked with our insurance and handled everything with professionalism and kindness. Emily had her surgery yesterday and is recuperating in the very capable care of my parents. 

Once again we have friends who have already offered to let us come over and use their washing machine.

The toilet still leaks. The a/c in the bedroom and the car are still broken. The power is still off. But I am confident that God knows what we need and will provide it. It will be fun to see how He choose to do it. Do I hope we get it sooner rather than later? Sure, I do. I also know that if we have to wait, good will come of it. The lessons I learned last time have hopefully made my faith stronger and made me more perseverant and more grateful for this go-round. I am hoping and praying that God uses our transformer issue to transform me. 

Does God hold out on us?

David told me that he had a conversation with a Congolese friend this week and the question arose: "Do you think you have all that God wants you to have? Maybe not all that He intends you to have, but all He wants you to have at this time?"

Compared to those of us who were born in the U.S., this friend has basically nothing. Nothing. It was a difficult question for him. 

It is also a difficult question for the rest of us because the more we have, the more we tend to want, and we desire that God would want us to have it. If we answer "yes" then we have to accept that what we want for ourselves and what God wants might not be the same. And if that's true, then we have to accept that our will might not be in line with God's will. Uh oh. If we answer "no" then we are sort of saying that God is holding out on us. Or maybe that we don't believe He is powerful enough to give us what He wants us to have. Neither is a true assessment of God's character.

It's easier for me to understand if I compare it to raising my kids. There were times I have held out on them protected them. I even withheld good things when I knew that my child was either not ready for it or could not handle it. If I had something they wanted and did not give it to them, it was always in their best interest. 

I know God loves me and those in my sphere of influence and because of that He gives me what He wants me to have to help me grow more like Him, trust Him to meet my needs, and bless others. 

Trusting Truth

I'm a Missouri girl, so I can't think of a better place to be refreshed and renewed than Missouri in spring and early summer. Everything is blooming and the colors are vibrant with newness. Baby birds and animals are everywhere and all around you can see and hear their parents keeping vigil and finding food. Everything smells, well, like spring. It's a balm for the senses and the soul and I loved getting to enjoy the season again.

You would think with all of that newness I would have returned to Congo recharged and ready to go. The reality is that a struggle began in me before I left the states and followed me here. It didn't help that I was sick the last three of my four weeks home. That wears on a person. Missionary life has made me more acutely aware that every moment with a loved one, every walk down a favorite path, every routine activity we so often take for granted could be the last, so you better savor it. 

I didn't want to just savor the moments. I wanted to keep them. Watching my kids interacting with their cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents reminded me of all they miss when we are away. My first-born went off to college at 18 and for two years he was the only one in our immediate family on U.S. soil. When breaks and summers came and other students went home, his "home" was 7,000 miles away and unreachable. He had places he could go stay, but they weren't "home." Now my daughter is in the same predicament. My youngest struggles with isolation and life without electricity most of the time and he can't even get packages from his grandparents. 

I felt like I had cheated my children. 

Feelings cannot alway be trusted, though, and I know that. How I feel can be affected and manipulated by many things but Truth never changes. The truth is that God is our Shepherd and takes care of us as a shepherd cares for his flock.  A shepherd safely leads his flock to where they need to be to find nourishment and rest to grow strong and healthy. He carries the weak ones and the littlest ones because he knows how fragile they are and how hard the path is. God knows the path ahead of my kids and He's got them in his arms. A shepherd leads the mamas in his flock with gentleness. He knows my feelings and doesn't disregard them, but gently beckons me to trust Him. To trust Truth. 

"He tends his flocks like a shepherd: 

he gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; 

he gently leads those that have young." 

Isaiah 40:11

Out-zoning

zero gravity (Photo credit: Tattooed JJ)

I worked in social services for three years in Missouri and had to do the occasional home visit, so I thought I knew what poverty looked like. Until I came to Kinshasa and visited people here. I saw families living in tiny two room, window-less homes with tattered curtains for doors, dirt or concrete floors, no electricity, no indoor bathroom, and no water. This was not in a village in the interior, this was in a city of 10-12 million people. 

Sometimes, we let God lead us out of our self-defined bubble of safety and security and then we think "phew! Made it!" and we praise God. We see that He used it to change us, to bring glory to Him, and we are glad we surrendered our fears, took His hand and let Him lead us.  But that's not the end. Every time we step out of our comfort zone, it creates a new boundary. The zone may grow larger but we still have to keep being willing to let God take us to new levels so that we are humbled, stretched, and usable and He is glorified. It's scary. It's hard. But when we are part of something that is impossible apart from God, and people see it and praise Him, and it's not just us who are changed but also those around us, how awesome is that?!

Fellow MAF'er Liz Schandorff shared her experience in her post "Going Outside My Comfort Zone" on the MAF blog. Liz's experience mirrors some of mine and I hope you will read her post and see why she is willing to step out of her comfort zone again and again - why we all should be.

Good read, folks!

From a Distance

Abram Journeying into the Land of Canaan (engraving by Gustave Doré from the 1865 La Sainte Bible) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

My Bible study topic for the high school girls this week was Hebrews 12:1-2 and in preparation I decided to go back and read chapter 11 for context. I wanted to help the girls see what all these heroes of the faith had in common that made them heroes. They didn't all have the same race to run, each had their own mission from God. They didn't face all the same obstacles and hardships. They were different ages, genders, and nationalities. Some of them made big mistakes. Some of them were afraid or doubtful. But they all obeyed. In faith. I'm kinda glad that how much faith they had isn't a detail that is recorded in Scripture, only that they had it. Maybe some of them started with only a mustard seed's worth. 

My attention was drawn especially to Abraham. Perhaps it's because being a missionary makes me feel like I relate to Abraham just a teensy weensy bit:

     "By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going. By faith he made his home in the promised land like a stranger in a foreign country; he lived in tents, as did Isaac and Jacob, who were heirs with him of the same promise. For he was looking forward to the city with foundations whose architect and builder is God." (vs.8-10)

Our family said yes to God when He said "Go," without knowing where we were going. We have made our home here as strangers in a foreign country and in some ways will always be regarded as strangers regardless of how long we stay or how well we adapt. Abraham lived in tents. Even in the promised land he was a transient. His son and grandson also had to live in a strange land, just as our children had to come here and be foreigners alongside of us. 

But Abraham was not focused on his circumstances. He was focused on the promise! He knew that the earthly promised land he pitched his tent in was nothing compared to the heavenly promised land he was looking forward to! And he wasn't the only one.

     "All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth. People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country--a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them." (vs. 13-16)

They saw them and welcomed them from a distance. You have to be looking forward, not back, to see what's on the horizon. They admitted they were aliens. The Message Bible says it like this: "They saw it way off in the distance, waved their greeting, and accepted the fact that they were transients in this world." 

Transients. Just passin' through. 

 Have you ever seen someone you love way off in the distance and waved a greeting? Or even just across an airport terminal? You don't just wave. You smile. You beam! If you are related to me you shout and maybe jump up and down a few times. And you take off toward them! You can't wait to get to them! The closer you get, the more excited you become.

I may not always know where I am going, but I know I want to keep looking forward in anticipation of all He has in store for me. I want to welcome it from a distance.

Sappy Birthdayversary

Birthday Cake (Photo credit: Will Clayton)

Here is an update on our prayer needs. We still need a place to live. The electric company is still harassing people. They have not picked on us, yet. We have a new team member, Emmanuel, who is adjusting to life here and working in the hangar with David.

Today marks four years that we have been with MAF! I never forget our MAF anniversary because it falls on our oldest son's birthday. Last week our daughter had her first birthday ever without her big brother. Today is the first time Josh will have had a birthday away from us. Next month, our youngest will have his first birthday away from his brother. I knew when we joined MAF, on Josh's 15th birthday, that one day there would be thousands of miles between us and our children. I told myself that would be ok, that God would take care of them. Even if we were still in the states, they would still have to grow up and leave the nest, right?

Mail box (Photo credit: Mark Sardella)

But I didn't realize how hard it would be. I can't just run to the nearest store and buy a gift and a greeting card and pop them in the mail. There is no postal service. No shopping mall. Between the time zones and the slow connection, we can't usually get skype to work. And right now, he has no phone service so we can't call him even on our phones. It isn't just birthdays that bother me either. I couldn't send him goodies during his finals. I couldn't go to his rugby games. Someone else has to drive him to the doctor or the store. There is no one to bake him a birthday cake.

So the prevailing mood at our house has been rather melancholic. We all miss Josh even more than usual. While I was in my self-pity mode I wrote this "letter to my children." It's pretty sappy and not very good, but oh well. It's the thought that counts.


My Mother Heart

I have two hearts. One is my human heart. The other is my mother’s heart. And they are sometimes at odds with one another.

My human heart knows you were never mine. You were a loan, entrusted to me for a time to love, nurture and train. I always knew I would one day have to let you go.

My mother heart will always think of you as mine, and will always long to have you near me.

My human heart knows that you will make mistakes along the way and prays you will learn from them, becoming better and not bitter.

My mother heart wants to protect you from even your own mistakes.

My human heart knows that you are learning to take care of yourself and make your own decisions, and that this is how it should be.

My mother heart wants you to need me, just a little.

My human heart knows that God has you in the palm of his hand. He loves you more than I ever can and is faithful and trustworthy.

My mother heart sometimes fears for you anyway.

My human heart knows I don’t deserve you. You are incredible, precious, and amazing. You give me joy and laughter, and yes, some tears. I love watching you: as you interact with others, as you learn and play, as you grow in your faith. I am proud of you and will always love you.

My mother heart feels the same way.

On Being Jealous of a Cat

page created with "Doodle Pets" kit by Michelle McCoy of Scrapbook MAX!

     A few months ago a half-grown, starving cat wandered to our home.  “Piper” quickly became part of our family.  This week Piper had kittens!  She tried to have her babies on a prom dress that had been given to Emily.  I caught her clawing at it and shut her out of Emily’s room.  She was so determined to use that dress (We girls do like pretty dresses!) that she stood outside Emily’s door for a very long time and went into labor in the hallway so we had to move her. 

     I’m a little bit jealous of Piper right now.  Not because she had five babies in one day OR because she now lives most of her life in a laundry basket.  She’s strong.  She only meowed once through the whole ordeal of birthing five kittens.  My own labors were a teensy bit less serene.  She had her old figure back within 24 hours.  (absolutely NOT FAIR!)   She always seems to know what to do for her babies.  Piper is a good little momma.  She never seems to get upset or angry.  She EVEN looks like she is smiling while she’s laying there in that basket nursing five babies at once for twenty hours out of every day.  Even if she could talk, I don’t think she would complain.  It's not her nature to complain.  Elliot, our other cat, complains enough for both of them anyway.

     Piper instinctively knows what I too often forget: “It’s not about me.” I want to see even the most mundane tasks as golden opportunities to bless and nurture my kids.  I want to be more patient and gentle.  I want to go about the business of managing our home pleasantly, not with grumbling and complaining.  I want to “shine like stars in the universe” as I hold out the word of life to my children and to everyone else around me. 

     I am grateful for God’s mercy and grace when I make mistakes as a mom.  I’m also grateful that I can trust Him to continue transforming me into a more Christ-like person and finish what He has started in me.

The 52 Challenge

image created with Crisp Linens kit by Kathy Woolery of Scrapbook Max!

This week is topsy turvy. I am homeschooling a couple of extra children this week, beginning yesterday, so I went to the orphanage Monday instead of my usual Friday in order to give them a consistent schedule. We took a few toys with us and when the staff saw them they brought out more toys from storage so there would be plenty to go around. We had one of those "See and Say" toys where you pull the handle and it makes animal sounds to match the pictures. The kids liked that but they were more interested in their discovery that the holes on the back where the toy was screwed together were just the right size for all their used lollipop sticks. Sort of like tinker toys. As always we had fun. I was mostly over my illness but still fatigued and those giggles were good medicine!

We are grateful no one else in the family caught my illness! Please pray for our electricity. Once again the electric company has simply cut the line to our street altogether because they didn't want to come out and fix the problem. We have friends trying to help but don't know how long it will take. It can vary here from a few hours to several weeks.

I found a blog this weekend that began a challenge in January to memorize a Bible verse each week for a year. I know it's February but the author encouraged readers to join the challenge any time and just continue until we learn 52 verses. So who is up for a challenge? Check out The 52 Challenge.  I am going to begin with this one:

Isaiah 41:13 - "For I am the LORD, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, 'Do not fear; I will help you.'"

I love the image this verse gives of God taking hold of my hand.  As a parent, I remember taking the hands of my children when they were little to help them navigate without falling if the pavement was rough, to keep them from straying into dangers like traffic or crowds, and to make them feel secure.  When I tell my kids not to be afraid and that I will help them, it is because I mean it.  I am watching out for them and protecting them and I desire for them to trust me.  I can picture God telling me "I've got this," and taking my hand to guide me and keep me from stumbling, whether through my dark house and neighborhood because the power is out, or through the darkness, chaos and oppression of this crazy world we live in.  And I'm reminded that when He tells me not to fear, it is because He will help me.  He's in control.  He's holding my hand, and He's "got my back."

Hands in the Air!

Image via Wikipedia

   
     We say so much with our hands without even thinking about doing it.  Remember the popular exression several years ago "talk to the hand?"  We use our hands to give and receive, to say "come" or "go", to show our intents and feelings.  At our church here in Congo, people extend open hands during the benediction as if to be accepting God's blessing.  When a child raises his hands up to his parents, he is saying "I want you. I trust you.  Pick me up!"  We raise our hands to show excitement when cheering for our favorite team.  At amusement parks some people on the rides have their hands in the air and smiles on their faces.  Others, not so much.
     It isn't hard to compare real life with a roller coaster ride.  Both can be terrifying, taking sudden unexpected changes in direction and going way too quickly for us to take it all in.  You can't always see what's ahead and sometimes it turns everything upside down.  On the other hand (no pun intended), both can also be a thrilling wind-in-the-face experience that leaves us laughing and saying "That was an awesome ride!"  Some of us ride roller coasters with our hands in the lap bar, white-knuckled and tense, dreading the ride.  Some though, anticipate a great ride and say to everyone else on the roller coaster:  "It's more fun if you ride with your hands in the air!"  They trust the safety straps to keep them in the right place and protect them.  If my walk with God were a roller coaster ride, I'd want to be a person that anticipates a great ride, knowing no matter which way it turns or how many loops it takes me through, He is there.  I want to ride reaching to Him in trust and ready to receive his blessings, and to let my companions know that it is more fun if you ride with your hands in the air.

     "Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you.  I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands." Psalm 63:3-4

Titus 2 Blog Party

I just discovered Michelle's blog - She Looketh Well - today! Michelle is hosting a Titus 2 blog party, a chance for us to meet other bloggers and have some fun. Go check it out! So, anyway, here is my Titus 2 Blog Party post and introduction. Hi, I'm Nancy Burton. I'm a new blogger, since the first of the year, and still getting the hang of it. In fact, I didn't know how to even put those links above until today and I had to ask someone how to do it. I'm a Christian, a missionary wife, and a home school mom. Right now we are "prefielders", still getting ready to go. We are scheduled to depart for language school in August and are pretty excited about the adventure God has us on. He is using this time to stretch us and grow us. We have made incredible friendships, learned more about the internet, computer programs, writing and corresponding, budgeting, flexibility, trusting, and waiting, just to name a few areas. Trusting and waiting have been in the forefront. The one thing I am constantly reminded of is that I am not in control, nor am I supposed to be. I have been forced to trust God more and wait on Him more than I ever have before. I am sure this will serve me well when I get to Africa. I started blogging because my teenage son kept encouraging me to try it. He was having such a good time with his blog, keeping in touch with his friends from far away that I thought it might be a good way for my friends and family to keep up with me, especially once we leave the U.S. I still haven't decided on a permanent name for my blog (suggestions, anyone?) or gotten around to learning how to personalize my template. Even though I am new to blogging, I have already discovered some cool blogs and benefited from the wisdom that others have been willing to share on their blogs.