A Sad Goodbye and a Lesson in Congolese Culture

My grandmother with my grandfather, Josh and Emily (top rt) and Daniel

Here is sort of a wrap up of the last several days.

Daniel got his stitches out!  We are grateful he had no infection or complications.  Being a ten year old boy, he's not the least bit upset about having a new scar - he thinks it's cool.  He is however, disappointed that he gets to take baths again.

Emily made 1st semester honor roll!  This was for her first semester outside of a home school environment, so we are very proud of her for doing well in her studies while she was also dealing with the adjustment to a new school, friends being gone on furlough, her brother leaving home, and starting the school year with her mom out of country having surgery.  She's a real trooper!

Josh is playing his guitar now in worship time at the Baptist Student Union on campus, sharing his faith with others, playing rugby, and hopefully studying.

David has been trying to accomplish the impossible task of having no toilets or faucets leaking anywhere in the house for a whole day.  The plumbing supplies here are of very inferior quality and break almost as quickly as they are installed.

I am working on our next newsletter.  Well, ok, I'm thinking about working on our next newsletter.

MAF featured one of my articles on their BLOG.

Recently, I wrote about having friends whose father was near death and my grandmother being in hospice.  Both of them passed away just days ago.  I am heartbroken over the loss of my grandmother and the fact that I cannot be there with my relatives right now.  She was a very special lady, strong, faithful, and compassionate.  We'll all miss her terribly.  I do find it comforting to know she is now in heaven with her Savior and we will have a reunion one day.

We attended our first funeral here in Congo on Sunday.  I can well imagine what my grandmother's funeral might be like, at least in general.  Most funerals in America have certain similarities because of our common culture, plus I know my family.  It is the same here, except that the culture is vastly different.  Here are just some of the differences that I noticed:

* The funeral was outdoors in a concrete gymnasium in 90 degree weather.
* Instead of padded church pews we sat under awnings on plastic lawn chairs.
* There was another funeral in progress on one side of us, and a church service on another side, both of which had live bands and PA systems competing with our service.
* Men in rolled up jeans, flip flops, and ragged t-shirts were walking around selling soft drinks and water, which they carried on their heads in bags of ice.
* There was a rooster crowing every few minutes.
* There were at least four languages spoken: English, French, Kikongo and Lingala.
* The family was expected to feed everyone.  In Congo no one brings food to the family or offers assistance.  They do bring money.
* The services lasted several hours.  We were there for four and missed the burial service.
* There was a man wearing a sandwich board walking around selling Polaroid-style photos of the service, during, not after, the service.
* None of the flowers were real and all of them were wrapped in plastic.  Instead of being displayed in advance of people's arrivals, they were presented to the deceased in a processional by the donors near the end of the service.  It is the family's responsibility to ensure that there will be some flowers at the funeral, but anyone can give flowers.  They are gifts to the deceased, not the family, and they are buried with the deceased, but first they are torn off their frames to prevent them from being dug up and sold by thieves. (A note: Grave robbing is so common here that often the casket is smashed to make it unsellable and less likely to be stolen.  Grave markers are also intentionally damaged to ensure that they aren't stolen, painted over and resold.)

I'm sure there are other differences I didn't notice because there was a lot to take in.  It was indeed very different from my own culture.